A Strange Letter To Future's Mother

My first word to future mother is that, we could be a total of a piece, but now, i can just say farewell lobster, farewell. Farewell the light of my eyes farewell. As u can fell and see, humans is very strange and all of feelings can be extinguished just like we are feeling each other with you. but be sure about that, all of your trace in me will be remain forever.Think to me in the rest of your life when your tears down from your eyes cause i would like to describe myself as a bad day friend for you who is searched for a place that didnt remind you for him a long time and one day he ll find it and complate his reconstruction.

As u see every evening feel like those for me , and it will be. İf life is the struggle, u was key point of the struggle coral. even birds comes back to home but u, no chance to back here. i wish u didnt go. i wish u wont go from inside of me actually. how can i lived a lot of thing, im feeling lonely how much i lived . and i wish u understand the fact as much as me. Finally for this phase, how much i can live alone it's better for our life ( The loneliness is real loneliness. not physical loneliness).

This phase of saudade seems like, blowing to hands of garbagemens. could u got my point ? Now i ll tell you how i describing you in my mind. i have just two fact next to my head when i m sleeping in my bed, first is universe second is you. another is a illusion of u, i saw you always figure of struggle. Let me explain when my tumor happened. ! we were in the kurdish girl's cafee first time and my lawyer also joined us. we discussed a lot of issue in that day.may/perhaps u can remember. First my lawyer helped to me discover ur volcano and ur fire there. when we discussed with u above some topic, during that period, he said to me '' u cannot block her fire, cause she is burning.'' after that point i just looked ur eyes, and i realized that, u were in fire and your fire so sincerely fire i've ever seen before after that my tumor happened and formed suddenly in my brain and until that time from that time i cannot get ride of my tumor . At least for my illusion, it was fire of desire of justice of the all of the world's people. i saw it from ur eyes cause u were very different culture and country. Anyway i just want to fuck you right now :)

im thinking that time from that time, i wish get the children from u cause you are one of the few people in the world who can be a child. i dont want to have liquid love, i dont want to have modernist love, i dont want to have free love or monogamy or poligami, all of these just sunbsequenly generated term of sick humanbeing. there are a sincerely and real thing in life although my philosophy doesnt believe that, im sincerely believe something like that in humanbeing like god or something else like that i dont know. at least in the points of me, the god of the life and universe is a human. im believing the miracle of the humans passion and human's justice struggle and the birth of new life from love of people of the earth. For example i always thinking about mother's love for her sons or daughters. Cause this feeling just special for a mother. u cannot find a feeling and behaviour like mother's , the mother of all kind of animals including human around the earth. this feeling at least point of me, the most pure and only non-selfish feeling and behaviour in the earth thats why im sick of motherhood. Although all my efforts, and although all freud or etc... i couldnt understand what was it .  Anyway, get aware of ur gender's value. Cause i probably not feel of that feeling in my life such like yours, as a mother and that ll become me halfhuman when i died.

Look i jsut want to give u a example. These mother doing resistance although all of turkey's communities fall in silent for their childrens which are in the hunger strike. and we cannot see any father at general in the action area.Despite all of manhood of the man, they are very afraid so much against dictatorship. in the other hand the mothers have a passion and they have a sincerelity. they'll be real revolutionaries of our history i believing that. also im believing that, a a man, we should respect and give a more chance in the public to woman so therefore as man, we were oppress the woman all time in human history, although we put the name to humand kind as a hu''MAN'' as a word. for me it's enough proof for oppression against woman. After that point, My all pain of my love for you become meaningless. Cause Freedom is your right more than mine .u have to been in freedom more than me, and u acting more free more than me cause of my fuckin ancestors, i mean male gender's ancestor fuckin changed ur DNA and social habits in wrong way. You must to be free that you have to suprise all people of the world. and u have to get ur revenge which revenge of ur ancesors from all males. why i want to do this, cause i loving you, cause i have a right, cause it is fair. Cause i just want to beliieve that all of my readings above human history, we have to choose new way and new life, and we have to try create new world which world is managed by woman.

You have to rule all this fuckin world cause u might know how to be mother. and might to be woman. and because of those, u will avoid to wars in world at general cause of u ll have a sons or daughters. cause im %100 percent sure about that, the man dont know how to be parents and how to be human. they just have dicks and masculine egos from their history.i m sure about those cause im man and im part of these madness.To be physically strong from something does not mean to insult her. thatswhy i loving to animal lovers people. you should love to animal lover people if u wont love me or u wont part of my soul in future. My only wish from u, never be part of animal enemy person and wont take him part of ur life !

i want to give this phase for you actually to myself for my feelings to u coral. im still couldnt get ride of my simulation and my tumor . in the other word, i want to get ride of that actually. i want to continue my way. Because i know that, i have no right to chance u also u cannot change me, u maybe know, my horoscope is a crab :))) . let'st throw al blame to the horoscopes such like as if there were no psychological problems of us.

Let me explain one more fact about my psychology, The poet said '' man becomes the prisoner of the emotion which is he presses.'' thats why i m publishing this fucking blog, i dont give a fuck u are reading or not.İndeed, i have to be honest against u coral ! cause u were my gem, this fuckin blog not for u, its for me ! this is existed for my comfort to my soul. i can write this shit cause my only proud ability is a be honest for my feelings. The poet wrote something
, though it was for me '' live ur pain until the deep ! and live ur anger to the deep ( the anger for u actually cause, im so angry against u cause for things what u didnt give me chance to live. ) but dont suppres your pains. dont attempt out and get what u want. dont blame urself! dont blame other such like coral. you cannot escape from ur fate so that no suppresion urself cause if u do that i l become to be prisoner of that feeling. And The women said ''thats why did u wrote ur poems to the blogs instead of her.'' and i said  it is different case. for me poem such like a human and the nudity might kill the poem. the poem need to provoked curiosity of human. nudity also night to kill imagination but some things are worth the fuckin imaginary world. the women respond ''what about the truth, in the poetry, is there no place.''  and i respond to her '' ofcourse there are huge of the portion in the poems of reality but there is a magical realm beyond the truth especially in the poem.the facts might die but the legends live never be died.

Why Sheik Galib loved to Hz. Mevlana's passion cause Hz. Mevlana loved very deeply to power which is loved the creator who made him believe in him. As u see coral, u can find every unanswered question in human's history. it was just mine. u can also find the answer in you history. your people's history. As muslim' s propet said, '' Our way is love, our mother is our love. when the women and men when they pull back from the way of truth way, the way ll be just become to teacher's way. The way of sexual love ll become to the teacher of the humanbeing and there ll be eternity at the end of this road and nothing is more precious than this eternity.''Anyway it is enough literature and mysticism for this phase .

we shoud back to real world for last words. İm believing that sincerely, the resisting mothers ll bring a peace in this fuckin country turkey ! i believing that sincerely. And now, i see yo as a '' resisting future mother'' . Maybe/perhaps, actually probably i wont be part of the country in ur future, this is not my bussines whether u become part of this country or not but im sure about that, u never change ur personality as a future mother of peace.  Even though u were in south america or asia when u become mother. you will always use the power of maternity passion of motherhood that cannot be explained ,and u always use that for justice and peace for sure. my advice to future mother is that, just fuck all of them who behave like '' classical freudian against u '' . Because your volcano is beyond all the genders.you are beyond everything as long as be CORAL. At least you're worth more than a thousand freuds for Roj.

 i will not make the final kurdish agitation from this stage. everyone knows what's what.and our mothers struggle is not just for a nation. it is for humanity. and im sure about it, as a persons like u ll perform same struggle in the future.

Finnaly, Is it possible to have two different time and place under the same rainbow? is it possible to have same feelings under the same rainbow as different place and time ?  Dont forget lobster ! while sincerely persons under same sky, living is a resistance.

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